Recalibrating
Recalibrating
Life does not move in a straight line. Sometimes we’re up, sometimes we’re down. When I am wanting change I ask myself two questions:
“What do I need right now?”
Most often, I have to sit with this for a little while, and really tune into noticing (both thinking and sensing). Sometimes I ponder it for an entire day or more.
Who/what can support me?
I think about my environment (human and otherwise). This also includes people and places that challenge me positively. I bring awareness to where I am and who I am with when I feel most grounded and like the best version of my present self.
Let me show you how this works when put into action. When I feel out of sorts I start thinking deeply. Here goes…
Being out of town and also sick, has caused my previous routines to become “off track”. Without a consistent, predictable schedule, I have been feeling discombobulated. I know that with my ADHD brain, schedules and routines, that still allow for some creativity, are crucial. They help me stay consistent and give me a feeling of accountability. Having a set framework reduces the cognitive load of daily decision making, and gives me a feeling of stability because I have an idea of what each upcoming week will look like.
So, after a great quarterly check in with my therapist (I keep these for accountability- it helps me to always keep aiming high. I believe in the importance of having formal supports!) I committed to setting a regular schedule in order to prevent burnout. Why? Because I am passionate about doing the work I do lifelong (value: social supports for neurodivergent individuals).
What do I NEED right now?
Balance.
What does balance look like for me?
Having a regular SCHEDULE that is focussed on some of my BASIC NEEDS. I know for myself that when I feel discombobulated, if I look after the simple things then everything else starts to become easier. Let’s look at some of the basics that are important to me right now.
SLEEPING WELL: I have now given myself a bedtime of 9:30pm: In bed, head on the pillow by that time.
EATING HEALTHY: doing the big grocery shop on a specific day of the week (I do 2 because I don’t like planning my meals far in advance). If I leave things to chance I end up shopping when I am hangry and also shopping too often, which is a big time waster. I chose to attach grocery shopping to happen immediately after my gym workout because the store is nearby and therefore convenient and easy.
EXERCISING REGULARLY: having a gym membership for group classes led by a trainer and making sure to go on the same day and at the same time each week. When I leave it “open” to choose a time each day, I find I am far less consistent. I have tested this out, so know this for fact!
DOING WORK THAT I FIND MEANINGFUL: set working hours that are sustainable long term, otherwise I will burnout. Create start and end work times and protect my non-working hours (with some flexibility of course…I am an entrepreneur after all!)
CONNECTING REGULARLY WITH FRIENDS: schedule time in my calendar to talk to friends on the phone rather than leaving it to chance, plan a new fun event/activity to do in-person with someone at least twice a month. Set a weekly day and time for an in-person walk with a friend, put it in the calendar!
2. Who/ What can SUPPORT me in each of these?
My environment, friends and family…also snuggles from my dog 🐾 Let’s break this down…
SLEEPING WELL- My pre-set nightly alarm reminds me of my bedtime. I bought one that is separate from my phone and will keep it in my living room. My family is aware of this new evening routine and kindly reminds me if I get tempted to ignore my alarm.
EATING HEALTHY- By attaching my grocery shop to my gym days it helps solidify a new habit and reduces the number of impulsive and craving induced grocery shopping trips. By going to the same grocery store it is easier and quicker to shop because the environment is familiar. I am also more motivated to buy healthy food after just finishing a workout.
EXERCISING REGULARLY- My gym has kind people. In fact they all clapped when I finished the workout the other day (I was last!). The trainer encourages me when I am there and both he and other members ask when I have been away. This helps me feel more like a part of the group and inspires me to keep showing up. No show fees also help get my butt out the door, keeping me accountable even when I feel unmotivated!
DOING WORK THAT I FIND MEANINGFUL- my Social Hub members support and motivate me by bravely trying new experiences and showing up fully as themselves. They share kind words of encouragement, as well as their thoughts and ideas. You all mean a great deal to me! 🤗
CONNECTING REGULARLY WITH FRIENDS- I let my friends know that I want to be a great friend and am trying to strengthen my relationships. I do not want to continue down an unbalanced path of working too much and neglecting my relationships. I tell them and am interested in going out and trying new things around town. I plan and invite them out with me. This is supportive because they often reciprocate by inviting me to new events and activities as well.
The key in creating any lasting change is to know yourself and what works best for your brain and your way of doing things. Neurodiversity is exactly that…diverse! It shows up differently in everyone.
Creating and following a schedule is something that I find always brings me back to balance. If you don’t know what works for you, that is OK! Start by asking yourself the two questions above, really take your time and think deeply when answering them. Next, try out your new strategies. Afterwards, assess if what you tried felt right for you. Adjust as needed 🙂
To quote podcaster, Rich Roll, “Mood follows action”. Taking action and trying (with support!), no matter how small the step, will give you feedback that will help you continue to move towards the change you desire.
Come join us at the adhd SOCIAL HUB, we are your group for growth 💛
BONUS GIFT…
I do best with visual organization cues and reminders, specifically, tactile ones. The good news is I also have support for that! My friends, from Vancouver Island, at ADHD Central have created some amazing tools. I will be trying out a few of them, such as their habit tracker, their priority planner, their power hour and daily routine cards. I am excited to see how I do with them! Tune into our socials for updates.
ADHD Central has generously gifted our group with a 20% off discount code so you can try their many resources out for yourself 😃
Use the code: SOCIALHUB20 at checkout.
